UFOs = Unbelievable Financial Opportunities?
Maybe this will finally keep Mom off our back about the piles of UFO books in our bedroom. And the closet. And the attic. And the garage. And...
If you’re into obscure books about UFOs or the paranormal, and have a lot of discretionary income (like, a lot), then there are some gems on the market that might fit your budget.
If you don’t have thousands of dollars burning a hole in your pocket, it’s still fun to window-shop and dream about how these pricey treasures would look collecting dust on your bookshelf!
The Jessup Dimension by Anna Genzlinger, Saucerian Press, 1981
Price Tag: $7,500
Morris K. Jessup was a ufologist and author whose legend grew after he took his own life at the age of 59. Anna Genzlinger’s book, The Jessup Dimension, is an investigation into the curious circumstances surrounding his life and the implications of his untimely death.
Jessup was a University of Michigan educated amateur astronomer who wrote four UFO books in three short years from 1955-1957. His first release—The Case for the UFO (1955)—was the most notable. In it, he speculated about the nature of flying saucers and concluded that they were real objects that manipulated gravity as a means of propulsion.
Shortly after his first work was published, Jessup received letters from an enigmatic man named Carlos Allende who asserted that the Navy had conducted secret tests related to invisibility and teleportation, known as the Philadelphia Experiment. Allende maniacally jotted notes about this and other fringe ideas in the margin of Jessup’s book, eventually sending his marked-up copy to the Office of Naval Research. For some strange reason, Navy officials distributed Allende’s notated version internally. While they ostensibly claimed that the document was of no value, the entire episode was destined to become a significant part of UFOlogical history.
Jessup committed suicide in 1959, a tragedy that became a point of speculation. Suggestions of foul-play soon emerged. Some believed that the UFO researcher ‘knew too much’ and was consequently silenced by the powers that be.
Genzlinger’s Jessup Dimension—released more than 20 years after Jessup’s death—convincingly argues that he may have been coerced into suicide as part of a larger cover-up involving UFOs and exotic technologies. Her hypothesis came about after years of pavement-pounding investigation and interviews with the case’s key figures.
The Jessup Dimension is a gripping read, but the hefty $7,500 price tag on this first edition isn’t due to its engaging storyline. Its value is attributable to the lines of scribbled notes left by none other than “Crazy” Carl Allende—the same guy who defaced a copy of Jessup’s Case for the UFO and sent it to the Navy.
Much like his earlier annotations, the copious commentary inserted into Genzlinger’s book consists of corrections and embellishments to the author’s original text. There aren’t enough clear pictures in the book’s listing to make out many details, but one page appears to show Allende crossing out the word “green” and replacing it with “blue” when describing the color of the “haze” reported by witnesses to the Philadelphia Experiment.
While Allende’s frantic scrawling made the book look like a serial killer’s diary, it also increased its value, sealing its fate as a rare piece of UFOlogical history. But good luck using this excuse when returning notated books to the local library. (Sorry, Ms. Anderson!)
Homecoming of the Martians by Robert Dickhoff, Bharti Association, 1958
Price Tag: $1,440
We couldn’t afford to read Robert Dickhoff’s 1958 book, Homecoming of the Martians, because even copies in terrible condition retail for over $200. However, one of his earlier books, Agartha (1951), is available for free online, so we read that one instead.
According to that book, Dickhoff believes that colonists from Mars were Earth’s oldest inhabitants and builders of a globe-spanning tunnel system. They were responsible for the development of Atlantis and Lemuria, and eventually, creators of humankind itself.
He explains that we are the product of interbreeding between synthetic beings created by Martian super-scientists and naturally evolved creatures here on Earth. Sadly, our cosmic forefathers were mostly destroyed after fighting a worldwide nuclear war against each other. The fallout from their use of atomic weapons drove the survivors underground into their elaborate subterranean world full of Titan-sized tunnels and inner-earth cities.
Dickhoff reveals that Martians weren’t the only extraterrestrial species vying for control of our planet—evil human-eating snake-people from Venus were on the prowl as well. Possessing the power to influence our minds remotely, they propagate thoughts of war and division as a way to keep humanity distracted and impede our progress. The reptilians work their mental poison on the minds of Earthling scientists, pushing them to pursue dangerous atomic bombs that can annihilate the planet. Dickhoff warns that sleeper cells of sinister serpents are lying in wait across the globe—hibernating in suspended animation until their brethren awaken them to jump-start World War III.
While we haven’t read Homecoming of the Martians just yet, reviewers describe it as an assembly of news-clippings that support the worldview Dickhoff laid out Agartha. Martians and Venusians are still bickering over our fate. Space serpents are still hostile. Strange disappearances are evidence that extraterrestrials are stealing (and eating) humans. Similar to Charles Fort, who believed we were “property” of some unknown intelligence that “fished” for us every so often, Dickhoff felt that we were “kept” by a powerful, off-world entity. In fact, he acknowledged Fort’s strong influence on his work by dedicating Homecoming to his memory.
Dickhoff doesn’t put forth many original ideas, but his focus on the far-out, fringe elements of the UFO phenomenon makes for amusing reading. The fact that it’s practically impossible to obtain a copy of Homecoming is a big reason why it’s listed for over $1,400. The price of admission is steep, but it’s almost worth it just for that classic 1950’s sci-fi cover art alone!
The History of Witches, Ghosts, and Highland Seers by Anonymous, Berwick, circa 1772
Price Tag: $10,358.42
The full title of this publication is The History of Witches, Ghosts, and Highland Seers Containing Many Wonderful Well-Attested Relations of Supernatural Appearances, Not Published Before in any Similar Collection Designed for the Conviction of the Unbeliever, and the Amusement of the Curious—which is less catchy than its rumored working title: These Witches Be Crazy. (Sorry.) Printed in the early 1770s, this fantastic collection contains “true accounts” of the usual fare—apparitions, witches, devils, and seers.
Some reports are hilariously mundane. In “The Dream of Alexander McDonald, Warning Him of the Destruction of a Corn-field,” a farmer’s dead grand-uncle tries to warn his nephew in a dream that his cattle are loose and destroying the corn crop. After failing to heed his ancestor’s warning, the farmer awakens to find his field trampled by renegade cows.
Another delightful yarn is the cautionary tale, “Wonderful and Strange Accident which fell out at Lyons France,” aka “Ain’t No Fun (If The Homies Can’t Have None).” (That was the last one, we promise.) In the story, we’re introduced to a lustful lieutenant in the French guard who gets the urge to have relations with a woman of the night. According to the book:
“After he had enjoyed her, he desired her, that, according to the custom of French gentlemen, his two comrades might partake of the same pleasure; so she admitted them one after another.”
Once the deed(s) are done, the gentlewoman whistles three times, causing the men to disappear. They later turn up dead in the gutters of a nearby city—killed by their rendezvous with a supernatural prostitute.
We understand that $10k for a crumbly book about ghosts from an anonymous author feels like a gamble—not to mention that the same copy appears to have sold for about $880 bucks in 2019. Whether or not the current owner will realize the 1,000% gain they’re hoping for is still an open question, but the opportunity to own a 250-year-old text dedicated to the paranormal doesn’t come around every day!
If you decide to break the bank for one of these expensive pieces of pulp, you should also invest in some white gloves and a fire-proof safe. But above all else—don’t let your Lamborghini sit in the garage! Remember to take your reckless purchase off the shelf and actually read it! A good book is priceless.
Great post, thank you. The Jessup Dimension has been reprinted and can be obtained far cheaper now.
Still cheaper than going to Disneyland!