Odd Old Advertisements
We comb through a lot of old newspapers while doing research for The Observer.
As a result, we see a lot of bizarre advertisements—especially from the early 1900s.
Take a look at some of the stranger ones below, and tell ‘em The Observer sent ya’!
The caption for this 1895 advertisement reads: “Your Face will be wreathed with a most engaging smile, after you invest in a White Sewing Machine.”
Yikes. We sure hope not.
The smile looks less “engaging” and more soulless, nightmare inducing.
Not a lot can be said about the veracity of the claims made in ads from the early 20th century. One thing we can be sure of—we never want to visit Dr. Coe’s Sanitarium.
This 1909 promo promises it’s the “best invalid's home in the West,” but we'll pass on the “difficult surgical operations,” performed on site.
The genius of this 1919 ad lies in its blatant use of deception—a classic bait and switch!
DRUGS...
not sold here.
We love the logo for Duffy’s Pure Malt Whiskey—it looks like a drunk alchemist.
This 1899 ad promises that their product is, “rich in upbuilding power.”
Spell-checker is underlining the word “upbuilding,”’ so we're pretty sure they made the term up.
Either way, it was marketed as a medicine and a stimulant, so Mr. Duffy had his bases covered!
Nice try.
The fine people at Hostetter’s want you to know that they’ve uncovered the connection between pure blood, good digestion, and somehow, nervousness.
Still, how a product meant to cure indigestion got the name “Stomach Bitters” is anyone's guess.
At first glance we thought this ad was promoting women’s flesh as a form of food.
It’s not.
It is telling women to literally hide their skeleton behind sufficient flesh... sentiments rarely seen in today’s commercials.
Price? Affordable at around 5 cents a bottle.
Healthy? Culmbacher Beer will “make you well and strong,” and it’s even “nourishing.”
Convenient and Discreet? They deliver cases in unmarked wagons.
Not all of Culmbacher's claims are dubious—as anyone who has had the drunk munchies can attest, beer does “sharpen the appetite.”
The marketing team behind this 1902 campaign painted a weirdly specific image with their words. Not one hammer, but 10,000 swung by devils!
Krause is also daring the haters to put their money where their mouths are—to the tune of $500 smackers. That's like $320,000.00 in today's money, give or take.
And remember, any drug that tells you it’s “perfectly harmless,” usually is.
Yellow mustard for arthritis?
That’s so 1920.
Bankers gonna bank (1913).
